Ji$@ In My Pants Uke tab by The Lonely Island

F                          G
Lock eyes from across the room
Am
Down my drink while the rhythms boom
F                          G
Take your hands, skip the names
Am
No need here for the silly games
F                          G
Make our way through the smoke and crowd
Am
The club is the sky and I'm on your cloud
F     G
Move in close as the lasers fly
Am
Our bodies touch and the angels cry

F       G
Leave this place go back to yours
Am
Our lips first touch outside your doors
F                            G
The whole night what we've got in store
Am
Whisper in my ear that you want some more
F                             G
And I jizz in my pants

F                             G
This really never happens you can take my word
Am
I won't apologize, that's just absurd
F                              G
Mainly your fault for the way that you dance
Am
And now I jizz in my pants
F                               G
Don't tell your friends or I'll say you're a slut
Am
Plus it's your fault, you were rubbing my butt
F
I'm very sensitive , some would say thats a plus

Am
Now I'll go home and change

(carry on with this rythem)

I need a few things from the grocery
Do things alone now mostly
Left me heartbroken, not lookin' for love
Surprise in my eyes when I looked above
The checkout counter and I saw her face
My heart stood still so did time and space
Never thought that I could feel real again
But the look in her eyes said I need a friend
She turned to me that's when she said it
Looked me dead in the face, asked cash or credit
And I jizzed in my pants

It's perfectly normal
Nothing wrong with me
But we're going to need a cleanup
On aisle 3
And now I'm posed in an awkward stance
Because I jizzed in my pants
To be fair
You were flirting a lot
Plus the way you bag cans makes me
Bothered and hot
Please stop acting like you're not impressed
One more thing
I'm gonna pay by check

Last week, I saw a film
As I recall it was a horror film
Walked outside into the rain
Checked my phone and saw you rang
And I jizzed in my pants

Speeding in the street, when the red lights flash
Need to get away, need to make a dash
A song comes on that reminds me of you
And I jizz in my pants

The next day
My alarm goes off
And I jizz in my pants

Open the window and a breeze rolls in
And I jizz in my pants

When Bruce Willis was dead at the end of Sixth Sense
I jizzed in my pants

I just ate a grape
And I jizzed in my pants

I went to. . .
Ok seriously you guys, can we. . . . ok?

Capo 1st Fret
F                   G
I jizz right in my pants
Am
Every time you're next to me
F                    G
And when we're holdin hands
Am
Its like havin sex with me
F                     G
You say I'm premature
Am
I just call it ectasy
F                     G
I wear a rubber at all times
Am
Its a necessity
F                      G
Cuz I jizz in my pants
Am
(I jizz in my pants, I jizz in my pants (x3))
F                       G
Yes I jizz in my pants
Am
(I jizz in my pants, I jizz in my pants)