No One Remembers Achmed Uke tab by Team Starkid

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Soldiers Alternating
F chordF
In your homeland you're a legend
C chordC
All the people know your name
Bb chordBb F chordF
On the battlefield and off you are superior


Achmed:
Spoken I know
Gm chordGm
In the kingdom though I'm finding
C chordC
that my only claim to fame
Bb chordBb C chordC
is an incident involving my posterior


Soldiers:
F chordF C chordC
Posterior


Achmed:
Spoken Please


F chordF
I've won scores of bloody wars
A chordA
And mopped the floors with my foes
Bb chordBb F chordF
But no one remembers Achmed
Bb chordBb
I've eviscerated peasants
Gm chordGm
From their heads down to their toes
G chordG C chordC
But no one remembers Achmed


Dm chordDm
Say my name in these parts
Gm chordGm
And you'll get a vacant stare
G chordG
Until you mention tigers
C chordC
Or spotted underwear


Soldiers:
F chordF C chordC
Spotted underwear


Achmed:
C chordC F chordF
So to restore my repute
A chordA
As a fierce fearsome brute
Eb chordEb D7 chordD7
There's only one route I see
Gm chordGm C7 chordC7
Arrange the slaughter of millions
F chordF Gm chordGm / G chordG
Of innocent civilians
C chordC F chordF
Then they'll remember me


(Dialogue)


Soldiers Alternating Achmed
F chordF
Caked in mud or drenched in blood
A chordA
You smell as fresh as a flower
Spoken I guess
Bb chordBb F chordF
But no one remembers Achmed
Bb chordBb
You can pleasure sixty concubines
Gm chordGm
In only an hour
Spoken Less
Bb chordBb F chordF C chordC
But no one remembers Achmed


Achmed:
Dm chordDm
Back home I was a hero
Gm chordGm
Ladies trembled when I spoke
G chordG
But here the women treat me
C chordC
Like a throwaway joke


Soldiers:
C chordC
Throw him away


Achmed:
F chordF
I'm a god on Earth but darn it
A chordA
Even deities incarnate
Eb chordEb D chordD
Now and then can feel a little insecure


Soldiers:
Insecure


Achmed:
Gm chordGm Em7 chordEm7
All I want is some affection
A7 chordA7
This rejection's almost
D chordD G chordG
Too much to endure


Soldiers:
To endure
Look at all he must endure


(Dialogue)


Soldiers:
F chordF
You ooze sex when you flex
A chordA
Those impeccable pecs


Achemd:
Dm chordDm D chordD
But the princess rejects me still
Gm chordGm
She may not love me yet
Bb chordBb
But I'm willing to bet
G chordG C chordC
That once I kill all her people she will


Soldiers:
Yes she will
Yes she absolutely will


Achmed:
Dm chordDm
Let them laugh that's just fine
F chordF
But the last laugh will be mine


All:
Bb chordBb E7 chordE7
Cause they can't laugh when they're all dead
Gm chordGm C chordC
I'll make them all regret
F chordF Bb chordBb
The day they chose to forget


Achmed:
D7 chordD7
Spoken What's that name everyone


Soldiers:
Tiger-fucker!


Achmed:
Spoken No

F chordF D chordD
Like I said what's that name


Soldiers:
Gm chordGm C chordC
You're the cock of the walk
Am chordAm D chordD
With abs as hard as a rock
Gm chordGm C chordC F chordF
Nevermore will they mock you Achmed


Soldier:
D chordD G chordG C chordC
He fucked a tiger


Achmed:
Spoken I did not fuck a tiger


Soldiers:
F chordF A chordA Dm chordDm C chordC
They'll remember Achmed
F chordF A chordA Dm chordDm C chordC
They'll remember Achmed
F chordF A chordA D chordD F chordF
They'll remember Achmed


Achmed:
They'll remember me


Soldiers:
F chordF
Tiger fucker
Tiger fucker
Achmed is a tiger fucker
C chordC F chordF
They'll remember Achmed
G chordG F chordF
The tiger fucking man

 

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