If I Were Enlightened Uke tab by Donnalou Stevens

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INTRO: G C A D G

   
G
Oh if I were enlightened
C
you wouldn't bother me 
D7
you could leave your socks 
G
and underwear from here to infinity.
                    
You could come in anytime
C               A
you like no fear of getting caught
D
If I were enlightened 
G         D   G
but I'm not, Yet!

G
If I were more like Buddha 
C
You could do just what you like.
D7
I'd embrace the other women
G
that came straight down your pike
        
Cuz I'd recall my oneness and
C               A
forgive like I was taught
D
If I were more like Buddha
G           D   G
But she's not, Yet!

Chorus:

G
Oh I meditate and contemplate
D
Sometimes I even levitate in hopes

that you won't irritate the heaven
G
out of me,  I take tantra and say
C               A
mantras a lot more than I want' a
D                           G
I even went and bought a Bodhi Tree
D                            G
She even went and bought a Bodhi Tree

G
If everything were perfect
C
I'd be the greatest wife
D7
I would not obsess about
G
Beginning your next life
             
I'd see your karma as my dharma
C              A
and forget we've ever fought
D
If everything were perfect
G         D   G
But it's not, Yet!

Chorus:

G
Oh I meditate and contemplate
D
Sometimes I even levitate in hopes

that you won't irritate the heaven
G
out of me, I take Yoga in a toga
C           A
that I got in Calistoga
D                           G
I even went and bought a Bodhi Tree
D                            G
She even went and bought a Bodhi Tree

Bridge:

G      D
Om, Om Omigawd
D      G
Om, Om Omigawd


G
If I could just surrender and 
C
learn to love what is
D7
I wouldn't care my toilet seat
G
is covered with your whiz
  
I wouldn't care I caught you
C            A
in my bra and underpants
D
If I could just surrender
G            D  G
But she can't, Yet!

Chorus:

G
Oh I meditate and contemplate
D
Sometimes I even levitate in hopes

that you won't irritate the heaven
G
out of me, My aura was a horror
C             A
so I memorized the Torah
D                            G
I even went and bought a Bodhi Tree
D                            G
Now she has a frickin' Bodhi Tree

Outro:

G      D        D      G
Om, Om Omigawd  Om, Om Omigawd
G      D         D  G
Om, Om Omigawd   Omigawd    Ohhh?