For Mayor In Splitsville Tab par La Dispute

F# A D x2

               A
Funny what you think of after a collapse
                                                                                       G
While lying in the dirt the first thing that comes back is never quite what you’d have guessed
                                                        F#m
And if you could have, you probably would’ve said you’d check if all your limbs were intact still and then try to get out
A
We played house with the neighbors in their basement
D              A
Sister made me husband she was older so I did her bidding
G          B              G                                F#m
I remember once their dad came in said, “You think this is bad?
You don’t know the half.” And he laughed.
A          Bm
It’s funny what things come back
The first things you see
C#             D                       Bm
How he sort of smiled like it’s only a joke but he was lying
          C#                           F#m
There was something else inside of his eyes
          E              D
All those secrets people tell to little children
Bm
Are warnings that they give them
       C#                                                            F#
Like, “Look, I’m unhappy. Please don’t make the same mistake as me.”
C#  F#            A                                      D                          F#
Why are those old worn out jokes on married life told at toasts at receptions still?
            F#m         A                            D       Bm           A
How does it never occur how often couples get burned and end uncertain in Splitsville?
                                       G                                                  F#m
Funny what you think of in the wreckage, lying there in the dirt and the dust and the glass
                    A
How you’re suddenly somewhere, in the desert, in the nighttime, and it’s getting close to Christmas
                                                    G
And then her and that movie voice she uses when she reads,
                                                        F#
“Welcome to the Land of Enchantment” from a highway sign
         F#m                           F#
And it’s late so you take the next exit
Bm                                                       G
When that trip ended we came back the rent was due I was jobless
                                              Em
I guess in retrospect I should’ve sensed decay
                                                       G
Then that day, how you said, “I just don’t know” and I promised

We’d rearrange things to fix the mess I’d made here
F#m   F#    A          Bm
But I guess in the end we just moved furniture around 
F#    A            D
But I guess in the end we just moved furniture around 
F#m   F#    A          Bm
But I guess in the end we just moved furniture around 

F#m A              D              E          D                             Bm
But I guess in the end it sort of feels like every day it’s harder to stay happy where you are
          C#                                 F#m             E
There are all these ways to look through the fence into your neighbor’s yard
D                 Bm
Why even risk it? It’s safer to stay distant
          C#
When it’s so hard now to just be content
                                 F#
Because there’s always something else
        F#m       A                              D                        
Now I’m proposing my own toast, composing my own joke for those married men
F#                                               A                            D
Maybe I’m miserable, I’d rather run for mayor in Splitsville than suffer your jokes again