The Negative (waitress) Tab uke di Sara Bareilles

Schemi di pennata: udu-uu , d-du-udu

( D# 4x )
Jenna, time to pee on a stick
Wh-? I don't wanna know

D#
COME ON HONEY, YOU'VE WAITED LONG ENOUGH
A#
GET TO IT AND DO IT!
Wh- okay, girls! Enough!
Cm
YOU KNOW WHAT WE MEAN
                  G#
I HOPE YOU DRANK ENOUGH THIS MORNING

D#
COME ON, SWEETIE, IT'S BETTER TO KNOW
A#
WE'LL BE RIGHT HERE WITH YOU, SO...
Cm
IT'S NO OR IT'S YES
           G#                      D#
BUT EITHER WAY YOU GOTTA TAKE THE TEST

A SQUAT ANA# A SQUEEZE
A#
A PRAYER ANA# A PLEASE
IT'S NOTHING
Cm
A STIG#K ANA# A LINE
             G#
JUST ONE OF 'EM, IF I'M LUCKY
D#
A POT ANA# A PISS
A#           Cm
HERE WE GO, SIS
                   G#
AND WE'LL KEEP OUR FOCUS ON
D#
THE NEGATIVE!

( D# A# Cm G# )
Read the instructions
English!
Do not insert the test stick into your vagina
Wooooow. Thank you, Dawn

D#
HOW'S I EVER GET MYSELF IN THIS MESS?
A#
ONE DRUNK NIGHT IN THAT STUPID RED DRESS
Cm
Oh, I love that red dress! The way it sparkles,
                 G#
it looks like an ice skating outfit
Stay with us, Dawn!

D#
MAYBE HIS MACHINERY IS BROKEN SOMEHOW?
A#                                     Cm                                  
WHAT IF HIS BOYS DON'T SWIM?! I MEAN, WOW! (Spoken) Miraculous luck!
Yeah, miraculous!
       G#
TO D#ET AWAY WITH AN UNPROTEG#TEA# F-
D#                       A#
FUNNY HOW ONE NIGHT CAN RUIN YOUR WHOLE LIFE
Cm                     G#
DON'T GO THERE YET, WE DON'T KNOW WHAT THE TEST SAYS

D#
I'M ALREADY PANICKED!
A#
Just calm down, Godammit!
Cm
MAYBE IT'LL ALL BE FINE
G#
MAYBE THERE'LL BE JUST ONE LINE
         D#
COME ON, NEGATIVE!

( D# 4x )
I thought you don't sleep much with you husband much anymore?
Well, I - he got me drunk. I do stupid things when I drink, like sleep with my husband
Honey, we've all made that mistake

A# Cm  G#          D#
FOCUS ON THE NEGATIVE!
          Cm       G#
THIS WILL ALL BE ALRIGHT
       Cm
IT WAS ONLY ONE NIGHT
G#
SOMEONE SENA# ME A SID#N
D#   A#
ONE LINE
Cm  A#
ONE LINE

Cm                     G#
THAT MEANS THE TEST IS READY
THIS IS IT . . .  ( D# 3x )

A#     D#...
Shit!